tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post5852180524413152746..comments2024-02-14T14:53:03.810-07:00Comments on Καθολικός διάκονος: Marriage as a sacrament of salvation, a channel of God's graceDeacon Scotthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01385969740195992108noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-17305715493619535342011-04-13T18:59:48.211-06:002011-04-13T18:59:48.211-06:00I agree with pastor. For me, marriage is a lifetim...I agree with pastor. For me, marriage is a lifetime commitment and never should be separated. Unless if there are some domestic issues, one should seek expert advice on <a href="http://www.divorceguide.com/usa/divorce-laws/" rel="nofollow">laws about divorce</a>.roymanserashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08250809101496120954noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-22709798433193760492011-04-12T07:32:48.612-06:002011-04-12T07:32:48.612-06:00I see your point. However, I see Abp Sheehan's...I see your point. However, I see Abp Sheehan's letter as really addressed to his pastors. I agree that the tone of the letter is too juridical. As I wrote in my follow-up post, I think it all depends on the pastoral outreach in the parishes of the diocese.Dcn Scott Dodgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09994604395739905637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-12858658259268093022011-04-10T21:14:23.155-06:002011-04-10T21:14:23.155-06:00Yes, I applaud the general content, but I thought ...Yes, I applaud the general content, but I thought it could have been more pastorally put. Something along the lines of "if you are cohabiting and think that's OK, you literally don't know what you're missing --examples of how sacramental marriage is different". Granted, that's more of a carrot approach. <br /><br />I do remember sitting next to my mother at her church when the priest, a man known for a certain amount of straight talk and sarcasm, was commenting on people living together before marriage and finally shouting "and you mothers tell me you don't want to harm the family by calling your kids out on this! I want to remind you--YOU'RE THEIR MOTHER!" I could feel my mom stiffen in shock (both my brothers were living with their girlfriends, both eventually got married to them as well). She was NOT happy, but more importantly, it didn't encourage her to speak up! It caused her to retrench!<br /><br />I didn't say anything then either, since they knew what I thought and I couldn't figure out how to phrase it in a way that would matter to them. They aren't practicing Catholics.<br /><br />Anyway--it's all about speaking the truth in love, and I'm not sure this letter hits both marks.<br /><br />p.s. I laughed at the suffering comment in the newer post. Having you as a student, no suffering involved at all!The Ironic Catholichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12990289461877567408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-83168912023611601452011-04-09T08:00:40.986-06:002011-04-09T08:00:40.986-06:00I have no idea how people responded to it. One of ...I have no idea how people responded to it. One of my dearest friends, who is a religious order priest, used to be a pastor in Albuquerque. I certainly think this would require, both from the ambo on the Sunday it was read, and afterwards quite a lot of patient pastoral follow-up. I mean, if you just got up read the letter, went back to the presider's chair and recited the Creed that would constitute something of a foul in my mind! <br /><br />Since dealing pastorally with a lot of people who are in irregular marriage situations (I stopped doing marriage prep a few years ago because, along with everything else, it was just too much, but I still deal with some who are cohabitating) this is something with which I personally have a lot of experience. I can say that- in my experience- most people are eager to resolve these issues. The trouble is nobody has ever reached out and offered to help them.<br /><br />I think Abp Sheehan could've briefly highlighted the overwhelming evidence that people who live together prior to getting married have a significantly higher rate of divorce than those who don't. Many mistakenly believe they are setting themselves up for success, when they are doing the opposite. Msgr Francis Mannion, one of my early mentors, put it well when he said "People who live together before marriage tend to keep living together after they are married."<br /><br />I also would've like to have seen more emphasis to the pastors on the dire need for better marriage preparation across-the-board! To a large extent, this is a pastoral failureDcn Scott Dodgehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09994604395739905637noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-57816573955844566522011-04-08T20:56:42.624-06:002011-04-08T20:56:42.624-06:00Scott, this is a very good post, but I do wonder a...Scott, this is a very good post, but I do wonder about the reception of this letter as it was read from the pulpit across Sante Fe that Sunday. It's very "pull no punches", and I read that and imagined people walking out, crying, or both. Maybe I'm wrong. But does that get cohabiting couples to the desired end--recognition of wrong and reconciliation with the Church?<br /><br />Just wondering your thoughts--or if you know how people responded to it.The Ironic Catholichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12990289461877567408noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8254272216866737058.post-46835290419074573432011-04-07T18:27:40.188-06:002011-04-07T18:27:40.188-06:00Well said, Scott.Well said, Scott.Dan Snoreply@blogger.com